wordsofdiana:

dreamlordmorpheus:

spacelesbians:

Luke saying “you’ll find i’m full of surprises” to Vader before losing his lightsaber and falling down some stairs is such a life mood

its right up there with anakin saying “you underestimate my power” and then proceeding to get all his remaining limbs chopped off by Obi-Wan. like father, like son. 

Star Wars establishes the very real life lesson that a badass line does not guarantee success

(via isabela-merceds)

crunchytoasts:

stuck-in-jelly:

I think another thing that is objectively funny about Steve and Eddie is that the last time Eddie had seen Steve he probably looked like this

Vs now

op these tags are too funny not to be included

(via giraffeskull)

exit-path:

exit-path:

ferret-on-pancakes:

jumbleytumbles:

GIRL you are GLOWING! GIRL you are RADIOACTIVE! GIRL it’s FATAL!

When your bestie works in the wristwatch factory

wait hold on i gotta look something up

what the fuck

(via professorfonz)

chaumas-deactivated20240115:

chaumas-deactivated20240115:

chaumas-deactivated20240115:

chaumas-deactivated20240115:

chaumas-deactivated20240115:

chaumas-deactivated20240115:

chaumas-deactivated20240115:

villain going to the goon shelter to pick out a new henchman

this energetic and diabolical boy was rescued from a goon hoarding situation… he loves pulling levers, gloating, and turning cranks with great abandon. prefers to be the only goon. needs an active lair with plenty of enrichment.

now this fella comes with some baggage. his previous villain was going to have put down when he refused to perform unsedated human vivisection as a form of torture. one of our agents intercepted the execution and brought him to the goon shelter. would thrive in an environment of G or PG-rated villainry.

on the other hand, if you’re looking for something a little more… advanced… then this fine lady over here would make a great challenge for an experienced villain able to set firm boundaries. she will NOT be released to first-time villains; proof of prior henchpeople must be demonstrated before adoption approval. high prey drive. under no circumstances should she be left alone with children or small animals. must sign waiver releasing the goon shelter from responsibility if her behavior is deemed excessively depraved.

These two are pair-bonded and may only be adopted together. Up for anything, they are fiercely loyal to their employer provided their needs are met and they are permitted to hold hands. They look alarmingly similar to one another but it is undeterminable whether they are close blood relatives or lovers who choose to dress and style themselves in identical ways. Habit of finishing each other’s sentences with rhyming couplets; we have not attempted to train this out of them. Will answer to whatever names or titles you give them so long as they are complimentary and/or rhyme.

Will you help this goon find his forevil lair? He’s been returned to the goon shelter six times now but we refuse to give up on him. A vile little rat of a man, he’d be the perfect accomplice to someone willing to overlook his unfortunate heterosexuality. If gay-coding is not your style and you don’t expect it from a henchman, please consider giving this little guy a good home in your dastardly schemes.

This guy is not your typical goon. He was rescued from a high-kill shelter after being deemed unfit for henching. His deep baritone voice, his darkly handsome good looks, and his flair for the dramatic have made prospective employers pass over him time and time again, making him the longest resident of the goon shelter. But don’t judge a book by its cover—while his appearance and demeanor suggest “villain”, his real passion is taking orders and faithfully serving a master. If you’re secure in your villainry and not prone to jealousy, he may just be what it takes to turn your base into a lair.

(via kurtwagnermorelikekurtwagnerd)

uwuplasmiusuwu:

uwuplasmiusuwu:

I just remembered my second Pride, where I made different flag themed daisy chain bracelets/necklaces to hand out. I need folks to understand something:

They were free.

They were fucking free.

They were maybe ¢60 of acrylic yarn each at the most, and the whole ziploc bag of them took 2 hours max.

Three people gave me sad eyes until I took their money.

Someone who was clearly the mom friend of their group made me take a $5 and gave a 10 minute pep talk.

At least four more people insisted on getting change to pay for the, once again, free bracelets.

In spite of all these shenanigans, the absolute best was this one person who I can only describe as, “queer surfer dude who looks like a boyfriend who looks like a girlfriend.” I can remember nothing of the outfit, only the impeccable vibes. I did the same thing I did with everyone else, explaining the bracelets were free, and they nodded along as they took the last 6 strand rainbow bracelet. As soon as they had it on their wrist, they pointed at something over my shoulder and, like a fool, I looked.

Next thing I know, they’re running off cackling, yelling, “YOU’LL NEVER CATCH ME!” and I’m holding a fucking $20. I had to stop at least two people from chasing them, cause they thought the person stole something, and then they tried to give me money cause they thought it was funny seeing me flail over people being Too Nice.

That was the year I got reverse-robbed at Pride. I hope everyone out there is having a good time and, in particular, that queer surfer dude is out there still causing benevolent chaos.

After thinking about it for 15 minutes, I now know where the fuck my gremlin tendencies come from. I was always a little shit, and I always tried to be helpful, but this? This was when 19-year-old me realized that chaotic and good are not mutually exclusive.

The world has not known peace since.

(via seainthestars)

ifitsbritishimprobablyafan:

Steph is a fucking troll and I love her

unpretty:

jabberwockypie:

unpretty:

unpretty:

unpretty:

worst part of original writing is getting hung up on your own lore. i miss fanfiction where i could look it up on a wiki and get five answers and ignore them all to make up my own thing because canon is stupid.

#tbf didn’t op like…create a ludicrous amount of lore when they did write fanfic? (via @mollyhats)

let’s not bring the corporate structure of wayne enterprises into this, that’s different because reasons

#didn’t op also make a spreadsheet of all the things that make bruce wayne sad?#both as a fic and as a reference? (via @lady-of-innisfree)

okay listen,

I believe OP also made screenshots for an article from a pretend wiki for the pretend soap opera channel Bruce Wayne owns, about a character in a pretend soap opera, which detail the plots the character was involved in, and the in-universe controversy surrounding this character’s story arc and statements from the pretend showrunner regarding these events.

that’s

that’s a normal amount of lore, to have,

(via mankillercalledbunny)

thanakite:

viejospellejos:

Practice makes perfect:

@urbantheory

I love this and it was literally the best way to show it. By starting with the practice you get to see how hard they worked on this and that it isn’t like edited or visual effects, plus you get the satisfaction of seeing the finished product at the end

(via asexualarkhamknight)

zoanzon:

haiku-robot:

wonderfulworldofmichaelford:

curiooftheheart:

wonderfulworldofmichaelford:

curiooftheheart:

wonderfulworldofmichaelford:

curiooftheheart:

matt-the-blind-cinnamon-roll:

slapandticklelol:

“This poem doesn’t rhyme.”

Dude about to make haikus:

“Oh you haven’t heard?”

fuck you

The first line is six syllables.

THIS

POEM

DOES-N’T

RHYME

That’s 5 syllables

Poem is two syllables. Po-em.

Poem is ONE syllable, who the fuck uses two syllables to say poem?

What the fuck are you on about? Literally just say it out loud. Po-em. One syllable would be like Pome.

“Pome” IS how you say it you neanderthal. Who the fuck says PO-EM?

“pome” is how you
say it you neanderthal who
the fuck says po-em

---

^Haiku^{^bot^9. I detect haikus with 5-7-5 format. Sometimes I make mistakes.}

Disappointing each other includes you. | PayPal | Patreon

(via mankillercalledbunny)

obi-wan-keknowbi:

I think far too many people are sleeping on the sheer comedic potential of Ahsoka going on adventures with Old Ben and the plethora of migraines Ben would give his former grandpadawan. Especially as Old Ben insists on never breaking character and Ahsoka wants to scream.

Stormtrooper 1: Uh, sir, someone just took out a whole battalion about an hour ago in the swamp about a mile out of town. You know anything about that?
Ben, clothes tattered and covered in mud and sweat: I’m just a crazy old desert hermit. I wouldn’t know the first thing about something like that.
Ahsoka, who damn well knows that Ben is in his fifties, frighteningly sane, a former Jedi Master, and absolutely knows everything about ‘something like that’:

Stormtrooper 2: What about her?
Ben: Oh, this is just my dear granddaughter. You see, I have trouble getting around these days and she was ever so kind to offer to accompany me.
Ahsoka, who is well aware they are from entirely different species and look absolutely nothing alike and that Ben needs no help getting around anywhere:

ST 1: Well if you see any suspicious folk, let us know.
Ben, the most suspicious person in the entire establishment second only to the togruta sitting next to him: But of course! Good day, sirs.

Ahsoka, hissing: How the kriff did that work?!
Ben: Language, dear. We can’t have the good people here thinking I didn’t raise my granddaughter right.
Ahsoka: Can’t you break character for like five minutes?
Ben: I wouldn’t know what you are talking about.
Ahsoka: You’re impossible!
Ben, pouting: What a terrible thing to say to your dear grandfather.
Ahsoka, throwing her hands up: Argh!

If Ahsoka didn’t know how much of a Jedi’s Jedi Ben was, she’d accuse him of doing this to get revenge for all the heart attacks she gave him when she was a teenager. 

(via sonic-fairyspell)

bigwordsandsharpedges2:

thesparrow1996:

every single piece of franchise media released nowadays is so disrespectful to its audience i feel insane watching these things. they know they don’t have to put any effort in at all. everything is just a collection of tropes on a shitty video game looking background and there are innumerable people who go yeah that was cool. it’s literally treating you like a child with no object permanence and banking on the fact that you can point at the fancy trick or the cameo instead of recognizing the deeply stupid and insulting things playing out in front of you

“somehow palpatine returned”

(via its-captain-sir)